For people with anxiety, planning life down to the last minute detail can either be a blessing or a curse…
It can be a blessing because we can create a minute by minute account of how we will live out our lives, thus preventing any anxiety that may arise as we already know how it is all going to pan out…right?
It seems that plans can only really be a curse. We spend too much time thinking about the what ifs and planning for each and every outcome. We waste our lives creating maps of how things should be, weaving our way through the mundane in the safest way possible. We try to know each curve, each turn in the maze, before it arises, in order to ease our own inner voices of worry. We plan until we can plan no more.
There is simply no such thing as a well defined plan for every moment of ones life. It’s not how it works.
Theoretically, we can sit and think our day through moment by moment and try and prevent anxiety provoking accidents from arising. We can plot a graph of our day down to the finest detail. But what percentage of days ever end up fitting into these axis?
The truth is, we can’t plan ahead, we simply don’t know what is going to occur day by day. The world is unpredictable…a scary word for those with anxiety disorders. But we must remember the wonderful nature of unpredictability. Let it not worry us, let it excite us. Being unpredictable creates memories and moments to live for.
When did a plan ever go to plan anyway? And that’s the beauty of life! Our best memories are not those that were meticulously planned, they are those that were spontaneous and off the cuff, spur of the moment and magical. And that’s the memories that life is made up of, the memories that get us through the mundane days, counting down until the next special breath of spontaneity.
And I guess that’s what we call being brave. Letting go of plans. Letting go of the reigns.
Im going to stand on the edge of my empty map, drop my pen, and wait for the page to fill itself.