Ive had a bit of an emotional day today, and if I’m honest, I’ve probably felt it coming on for the past couple of days. I am still recovering from my operation, and still having good days and bad days, the worst of which include taking very strong painkillers and staying in bed all day. I’ve been overdoing it though. I’ve had my family visiting, and as I don’t get to spend too much time with them, I have pushed my body further than I should have, considering today marks 2 weeks since my operation date. My body is still healing, yet I have been out walking, drinking, out for dinner…
Too much, too soon.
My body has obviously been reacting to being pushed too far, and as a result I am laid up in bed today feeling very sorry for myself. There has been tears and frustration today. I’ve felt like a failure. It has almost felt as if I have let myself down by stopping, and for not being able to carry on. My body reacted to being pushed to its limits by making me sick, dizzy and feel all out of sorts.
I decided it’s important to listen to my body, and to recognise that I need to rest. My body is still in the healing process, and whilst I’ve done some lovely things over the past week, I am not super human! As I’ve been feeling wrongly disappointed in myself today, and a little flat mood-wise, I decided to make a conscious effort to remind myself all that I should be proud of myself for. And once I got writing, as always, I was surprised by how much I had done in the way of success.
Let me share…
Why am I proud of myself today?
- I got out of bed, when I really didn’t feel well enough too – I chose not to wallow in my self pity
- Today, I truly recognising that I succeeded last night – I ate dinner, in a restaurant, a busy restaurant, with my family. I was ok – and I even had fun!
- I ate breakfast today – I tried at least! Even if it did resurface, I recognised that I was not sick because I ate food, but because I was unwell, and they are different!
- I went for a walk.
- I listened to my body when I knew it needed rest and cancelled plans to do so – I come first!
- I allowed myself some alone time because that is exactly what I needed.
- I set up a direct debit to my local animal charity, and have sent an application form to become a volunteer – I feel so good about this.
- I fought off anxiety
- I let myself cry because I needed to!
- I forgave myself for being human.
- I wrote this list – which allows me to see how much good 24 hours can do!
Writing this list has made me see that allowing myself to be human, needing to rest, and celebrating my successes is just what I needed today.
Every negative day must have a positive point, it’s just about seeking it.